So… yesterday I had no intentions of leaving my house, but I promised some friends and I went to this party.
At that party, I practical knew everyone. And it was so funny because I just stood at one place, and people would come over and talk to me. I was afraid that I would have problems with having no conversation at all, but that didn’t happen. It was nice to see that people cared about me. I’m some way, I needed that.

But the funny part of it, was that in some part of all the conversation that I had, I discovered that I had (or still have. Not sure, but I don’t care) a fan club. HAHAHAHAHA! Yes! That’s true. When I least expected, this guy starts talking about one day that we were talking and he thought about the possibility of… you know… yeah… exactly that. ;] Then this other guy, says that he he had the biggest crush on me… and then this other guy comes in the conversation and says the same thing… And when I saw there were about five guys all talking about me, and about how they all “feel in love with me”. HAHAHAHAHAHA!
I didn’t know what to say. I had nothing to say.

A few things came to my mind about that subject.

1. They were all talking about how unreachable I was (am… and I hate that). That is so stupid! I am the easiest person to get along with. Why would they ever think that? In one particular situation that they talked about the guy that thought that he didn’t have a chance… well, let’s say that he was wrong.
2. Again! How is this true? Why would any guy think that they don’t stand a chance with me? Why? That doesn’t make any sense! Come on… I’m not looking for a guy that is good looking. I want a nice guy, that smiles and makes me feel comfortable to be myself and makes me laugh and whom a I could have nice conversation. Most the girls I know want good looking guys who with cars. I don’t need that.
3. If all the guys that I know think that way about me, I’m in the worst possible position ever! Because non of them will ever have the guts to come on and talk to me, I will stay single forever. FOREVEEEERRR!!! I don’t think its right for me to start a conversation with a guy. I all ready tried that, and it didn’t work. If it’s really true, then their are only two possibilities:
a) I could stay single forever.
b) the only guy that would ever have the guts to actually say to me that he likes me be Vin Diesel.

I pray that God, the one that made me like this, knows what He had in mind. I never intended to unreachable. On the contrary, I always wanted to be a person who everybody likes and can confide on. Well, I am that person. But I never thought that it would make me the girl how’s too much sand for everyone’s truck. It’s sad, isn’t it? Well, my hope is that Vin comes along pretty soon. So I wont feel unreachable no more. I’m not that special, ok? Really… I’m not.

Well, God knows what’s best, right? So I should trust in Him, right?

Dear Lord, some people would be happy to know that most of the guys they know all ready had crushes with them. But I don’t. It make me feel a little bit better about myself, because I’m not the unattractive person that I think I am. But it doesn’t help the fact that it make me feel unreachable. I trust that You know whats best for me. But still I don’t like the fact that guys think that way about me.
Well, You know whats best, worst that it all ready is can’t happen.
I trust in You, my Lord.